Someone I knew years ago tried to describe a woman she knew.  Because of the situation and how the person was described I am not sure to this day what exactly she was trying to say.  The description I was given indicated the woman had multiple marriages with some of the ex-husbands trading up to a younger model.  At the same time the woman had made sure she had a man around her when she was not married.  From memory this woman was described as “needing male companionship.”  I am not sure if the describer was making a statement about the sexual needs of the woman or the emotional needs.

I think of the awkwardness of that moment of someone saying a thing like that and I think what did you mean?  The trouble is I have a good idea as I know other people, usually of a younger generation who seem to exhibit the same behaviour.  They are unable to stand and face the world alone and would rather slouch together with someone  to lean on.  The issue is not emotional or sexual but both.  The problem is we have this idea that without sexual activity in our lives we have no meaning.  This is reflected well in a post by Haldane about David Matzo McCarthy’s book Sex and Love in the Home (Thanks Bec for pointing out the post) and a quote from McCarthy’s book “Those who believe sex is earth shattering will put it out of marriage.” (p44).

You see when we get messed up emotionally we try and find different things to fill our lives.  Our society from an early age indicates that sexual activity is a good thing, and you should fill your life with it.  Only one of those statements is true within certain bounds.  Yet in times of emotional vulnerability these statements by society is where we head back to.  Instead we need to find the strength in God, through Jesus Christ by the power of the Spirit to stand alone as whole people.  In times of emotional mess we need healing far more than we need sexual activity.

So can you stand?

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